Four-hundred-fifty-fifth Post

I don't know what I've gotten myself into.

Work can be fun, yes, but it can also be depressing, especially when there are customers of certain types.

Every time I see them, I feel envious, depressed, longing, sad, reminiscent, regretful. Regretful of my own past totally since I was a sweet, pretty child.


One, there was a family of three and the son was probably around 5? He looked like me when I was young sia LOL. Really pretty, and CUTEEEEEEEEEEEE :D HAHAHA. OMG WHAT HAVE I BECOME? The cute me has passed away and my mom had been devastated...

Two, there was this family of six — two sons, two daughters.
Honestly, the sons looked like my father's taiwanese friend's sons -_- so good-looking sia. and they reallie resemble my father's friend's sons o_o
the elder son actuallie looked like Mr Low and... my father's friend's son. arghs I wanted to take his number LOL -shy-

yea. seeing how the mom communicated with her children — tolerant, jokingly, humourous (she was asking me why the choices in the menu were so limited)...... when i compared her to my mom......
in essence, i wish my family was more like this family. who knows what i would have become had i this family?
had i not suffered unfair punishments by my parents?

........................................................................................

i forgot to say a prayer for the elder son. i always (or used to always) pray that the person i wished i could have gotten to know will do well.

well, he came over to the cashier to tell us that he wanted the bill with a smile. i was hoping that he likes me...... ha.


work was reallie depressing. i rarely spoke past 10 pm. i was too depressed ~.~

...... just thinking how sad my life is.

i don't know what's wrong with me. why am i like this? I wish God would let me know.


I regret very much losing Steven. Only he can understand me and respond to me appropriately. No one else can.


i bathed soon after i got home and then went to bed. i was thinking how lonelie and devoid of comfort my emotional side is. i guess i reallie cried myself to sleep

Samuel wonder if it'd be depressing too if i work at wild wild wet too

Labels: cry, newyorknewyork, sad, thoughts, work