Hundred-twenty-ninth Post

o.o
杀人、杀己

Hundred-twenty-eighth Post: CIP

cip at taman jurong.
Jurong Assist.

the point is: my team got one YANDAO RJC GUY
SHUAI GE~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
hmm... maybe a mix of delon and yaoming
dunnoe la. shuai ge jiu dui le.

hmm... hinted him abit...... always looked at him...
then just now he also walking past i jut my handphone then it rubbed against his bodie x.x
x.x then he turn around........
hmmmmmm.........................................

alas, cannot.
hais Tn~
too shy le...

wanted to fold that crease for him >.<
anyway, i love you korkor < DDD
drafted an sms to myself. haha. just being pessimistic...
Samuel

Labels: 09term2, CIP, iwnwil

Hundred-twenty-seventh Post

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

heard his voice abit
but i missed it when i had the chance )';

he go le!!!!!! TWO MONTHS DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD"x
who knows if he'll not be coming back
or i wont be around anymore

sleeping lor......
now awake coz sammel dragged me awake
blur unu

Samuel

Labels: 09term2, sad

Hundred-twenty-fifth Post

i'm thinking and thinking and thinking
that he'll never be mine
i'm thinking and thinking and thinking
that he's being like me... maybe
unwilling and unable

just by thinking, i feel hurt inside ~n~
...........................................................................

just put the phone down
had a nice chat wif someone =x
thanks for chatting with me < DDDDD

but just thinking...
thinking of him and his elder brother
thinking of him and his unfortunate misfortunes
just empathising

i don't know......
)';

I want to be yours
i want you to be mine
please do!
sad... and school's killing me
Samuel

Labels: 09term2, sad

Hundred-twenty-fourth Post

just woke up u.u

kinda sposed to play l4d wif bro

wonder how i dozed off u.u

wahhhhhhhhhh, treated so well by his bloodbro
i wish i were both his bro and him u.u
live some kind of submissive life u.u
i dont mind ><

always thinking of him @@

---

imeem uploader is screwed up
and web uploader is (sn)

byebye touch my hand DDDDD: go -LAONAINAI's blog to listen u.u

---

he's leaving in two days )';
i wish our r/s could develop into a more intimate one u.x

i keep on opening my saved messages folder to view sms-es x.x

---

it's snowing
my bodie's plagued with rashes
spreading always from my left chest x.x
itching like mad
D:

u.u sobsob


heartvenven

tired............................................

i'll continue to think of him...... smile at the sms-es x.x
< DDDDDD come back soon T_T

Samuel

Labels: 09term2, imeem

SpikeDog123

my life is so screwed up xD
screwing up further, with the sole intention to incite hatred
to invoke rejection
to waste my wastrel life away

always giving wrong impressions and i enjoy that
always being cryptic
being arrogant, too clever for my own gooood
so pessimistic, so masochistic
so rejected, so rejecting
a shame
a dishonour

when you say i love you, i may feel it
when you say i hate you, i feel it

a big lie wouldn't make me imagine someone's my bolster

to kill
...............................................................................

to kill
to disappoint

i just wish i can die
so, hate me
hate gays. gays should die
paedophiles should die
beguiled youths should die
misfits should die

to cry.
crying makes me feel good
i don't know why i'm so masochistic
must be the effect of years of rejection and hurt
pain and longing

i'm a fake
a cheat
a thief
a murderer
as i have said, i feel good in two ways: love or hurt. i'm reducing to the hedonistic way of life. please. just love me. or hate me.
Samuel

Labels: 09term2, iwnwil, messedup, styh

Hundred-twenty-second Post: >.< x)

my venven said that if he didn't have to travel abroad so much, he would say yes to be my boyfriend!

Didi...... If you wouldn't need to travel abroad so much, would you say yes >.<

...will . will der . i dont know la , ive never felt the slightest bit inclined to please a guy before , but something about you just intrigues me . you make me question my sexuality ; you drive me crazy .

went out to meet yaoming korkor
so nice >.<
chatted with him... spent >50% of the time lying on the bench, head on his lap......
he played wif my nose... sayang-ed me...
just talked......
i went "korkor...", "korkor dont angrie..." bleahs
coz sometimes i went abit nottie and he turned abit angrie >.< )';
hugged him loads
love kor loads too >.<


Samuel

Labels: 09term2, iwnwil

Hundred-twenty-first Post: 出状况了

dunnoe yaoming kor wad happen

maths probability test was completely
COMPLETELY screwed up
i asked someone to be my bf but......
haha.

lost to some random person on clubxiangqi
sian.
...................................................

wonder if i'm wrecking the money of the familie

and things... are still as lazy

Samuel

Labels: 09term2, messedup

Hundred-twentieth Post

i lost to someone i won in the west zone competition
._______. by time
by 1 mere second

anyway, gratz all those prize winners =x

4W0D3L T_T
i think 18th of 58 people =x

Samuel

Labels: 09marchholidays, C.ChessCompetition

Hundred-nineteenth Post: Hwa Chong 90th Anniversary

Happie birthday, Hwa Chong! :D

today was the gala dinner x.x
prettie cool! xD









saw justin
szeto didi
wayne didi
weiting meimei
clement didi xD

thanks mei for pei-ing me =x

---

haha, 2W0D2L
wtf man xD

Samuel

Labels: 09marchholidays, C.ChessCompetition, HWACHONGGALADINNER

Hundred-eighteenth Post

relooking at my term 1 progress report...

fucking depressing
.................................................................................

wonder if i reallie deserve them
or are they trying to motivate me
i dunnoe.
it's malignity, FOR GOOD AND FOR BAD
zomgggggggggg

and. failed. ~_~

hmm... been feeling kinda well...
recruited someone pro @@
trying to recruit another

hope they'll stay, too

i'm one confused wreck xD

Samuel

Labels: 09marchholidays, termprogressreport

Hundred-seventeenth Post

one night, i phoned with my korkor
very nice......
slept well afterwards

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

i like this songggggggg

cry...........................................................

i like to cry

cry coz i'm rejected
i'm hurt

i like getting hurt
it makes me feel good

i wished i can have someone i want u.u
then i will also feel good
......................................................................
went pcbunk ytd
ped came

hmm...... win win win win win win win win win win win win
lose a few
got a guy playing maple beside me............
and people sitting like whores -_-'l|

you could see protruding shapes

God DAMN


PAEDOS _|_


and she can't speak properly -.-
what a curse to have me

think: she gave up her beauty for us
blah blah blah
we should be filial
but i'm an ingrate
too clever for my own good

God bless her
........................................................
Samuel

Labels: 09marchholidays, PCBunk, sad

Hundred-sixteenth Post: Char Yong Cup (West)

yoyoyo xD

5W0D2L @_@

won rv, and mingyang let me win xD
but...... overall onlie 9th T_T
no prizeee T______________________T arghs

gratz all who got prizes~
thinking and imagining made me sleep...
Samuel jonathan wee......

Labels: 09marchholidays, C.ChessCompetition

Hundred-fifteenth Post

the phone rang
it sounded hostile
but... okay.

i got a didi. 1998. means p5
haha... walking me to the busstop, he hugged me.
so guai ah...... =]

---

and... i dunnoe what i'm doing!
i just want to GET HURT
i want to be hurt
i want rejection..................................

i so old. got eyebags.
but didnt i have that too?

i think i'm handsome
but i'm getting uglier
and noone wants me...................................................

杀人
turn back time and choose alfred instead
of zhixiong

maybe i would have been so happie!
and people never replie me

i'm becoming hedonistic
it's all about feelings
just get it. who cares about others
thinking... being with someone... gets me the feeling
arghs..............

tomorrow got chinese chess competition
7.45am at jurong polyclinic......

no! NO!!!!!!!!!!
I WANT SOMEONE HAHAHAHA
someone. someone.............................................
______________________________________________________________

Samuel

Labels: 09marchholidays, dexus, void

Hundred-fourteenth Post

hmm...... slept kinda well
dreaming... dreaming...

and friendster's acting weirdly

with this entrie goes the music player... aww =(

someone came to my house to do homework
for 20% of the time
the rest, doing a lifeless thing

sai. all sai.
sai sai sai sai sai sai sai sai sai
ice cream sai
awhile sai
park sai etc.
i should die, if not you.
i reallie don't want to be hurt, but i want to feel good......
FUCK the englisch

i completed expert~ so happie


so proud ^^

magnifie the page if u cant see

monday... should go work
i want korkor x'(

Samuel

Labels: 09marchholidays, l4d

Hundred-thirteenth Post

wah

the bus ride back was nice @_@

was at era =x spent 5hours+++ there =x

who was there?
sammel
andrew
pim
nai
bur
prada
kurei
and i =x

and other almightie people =x
alvin
blablablablablablablablabla

haha, played db8 =x i felt damn pro @.@

hmm... lc came after pim
pim came after prada and me @_@
rendezvous with prada at bugis =x haha

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

very tired x.x

seeya pim~

Samuel

Labels: 09marchholidays, cyberera

Hundred-twelfth Post

death anniversarie
my grandpa has left us for a year.

today... must create a short storie.
i am thinking of Yuriko, a psychic girl manipulated by engineers in a futuristic, high-tech Tokyo to power up the city, including the bullet trains and household appliance, fantasticallie "invented" by Derrel, a biotech scientist.

sounding good... haha

PCME.
IBS

today, sabbie sarks coz watched an old movie called "Enemy Mine"
wad sai la -.-

german~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
haha. ate two sundaes

and laksa
bag snapped
got a laptop one

Samuel

Labels: 09start, deathanniversarie, sabbie

Hundred-eleventh Post

I feel EXTREMELY murderous

will i do it? will i really bear to smash the glass bottle against a head?
MAYBE YES. MAYBE I SHOULD KILL MYSELF

eliminate a weirdo
a psychopath
a nut

TO KILL OR NOT TO KILL
OTHERS AND SELF

the vein in my neck... it's like i'm a fat ass.
there's some bloackage. there's a throb
it's like if you cut it, i'll die
it's like it'll jam up and i will die

there's no place for me in this world
not even heaven

i should be in hell, sadly...
be a kamikaze
take others along till the split road between heaven and hell

i'll roll down a slope of spears jutting out
be cooked in wax
peeled by demons
cleaved

so aimless

maybe i should solicit
easie money
easie money
still, paedophiles... poor beguiled youths, some exploited beyond their pricelessness

What a bad day. TO LOSE TO RANDOM PEOPLE.
BLOODIE ~ISOLATION~
NOOB FAM LIAO? I DONT WANT TO BELONG TO A NOOB FAM
a fam for the apathetic
those who crouch together and give passive comments
those who harbour hatred. just waiting to lash it out on me
i'm lazie of living, yet i am inhibited to end it all and start something even worse

dwelling too much in complex thoughts, thoughts which may be true or nonsensical

not feeling good at all
the thought of killing i dont want to )'; i want korkor...

the thought of killing and destroying r/s-es
causing hatred
disclosing desperate, pretentious "love"
there is NO love.

just wrecking in the name of boredoom and fun
the sadism

isn't this the world we live in now
why complain?

kill me
..............................................................................
hahh
imagine the pain. PLEASE, give me sleeping pills
Samuel

Labels: 09start, thoughts

Hundred-tenth Post: Happy Birthday, Justin

Happy birthday!! =D
生日快乐 xD
Herzlichen Glückwunsch zum Geburtstag :D
overuse le...
abit messed x.x
frenster, facebook, sms, msn
haha...... laggggger

one year ago, i was kinda doing the same thing
waiting for 12mn
hmm......

anyway, sabbie on tues x.x
watched Princess Mononoke xD damn nice xD
and we were let off earlier o.o 12nn ^^
thanks Mr Ang~

Samuel

Labels: 09start, happiebirthday, sabbie

Hundred-ninth Post

to kill or not to kill
to submit. yea... kinda submitted...
feels...... good? =(
korkor! )';

and. to kill or not to kill.
hehe...... _____________________________________

---

sabbie was reallie... kinda boring <.<
trying hard to understand what the american/canadian teachers are talking about
and the film Blade Runner... <.<
dont understand the dialogues >50%

anyway... haha. ______________

---

and i cried myself to sleep yesterday... haha =]
i love you korkor >< i'm a funny boi~
and i dream alot
Samuel

Labels: 09start, sabbie

Hundred-eighth Post

firstly, DARINGLY, FUCK YOU foreverKID- _|_

I WILL KILL YOU. :D sorry kor =( ignore this message >.<

secondly, beaten. trashed. dumped.
by the almighty Alfred.

my heart hurts. extremely. badly.
it's like. you take a knife. and stab it -.- literallie
it's like needles. i don't know
总之，very pain.

Samuel

Labels: 09start, m

Hundred-seventh Post

i do love my friends
i do love my familie
i do love God............

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

i'm in love with another boi @@ another knife in your heart?
xiaomoguix...... haha
i miss the past ~.~

saw jiaying's bf O.O
and saw alvin didi =x so guai~
xmg also so guai~

today fb at cyberera, wah rename keep on losing to other fam x.x
then we won some fam xD say i hack -.-
12fie~ what can u expect =x
sammel sounds logical xD

i saw paopaocha play 12fie x.x so pro!
and xmg's Antidote =o didnt know @@
and i saw buibui :O
and sat beside domokunn aka rhelett again xD

sammel, nai and i were at cyberera =x haha...
8 dollars to become a member, with 5 complimentary hours =o
used up 4hours+ x.x

haha, my 8k there totallie sarrrrrrrrks



we took the bus to bedok mrt xD
took a train x.x bye nai =x
sam and i had icecream sundae x.x the countergal was nice =)


home~ sweet~ home~

Samuel

Labels: ~ISOLATION~, 09start, cyberera, imeem, iwnwil

Hundred-sixth Post: Good 'A' Levels Results

hi people xD

yesterday, i went out with burrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
xDDDD
so... i was late as usual xD

Hours: Events

1500: took 101
1510: took NEL mrt xD
1537: walked quickly to outram park EWL x.x
i thought i saw a hci person <.<
and i found out they have connected two new stations xD
Pioneer and Joo Koon :O

boarded the train~

1605: reached boon lay xD

1610: met bur jie at mos burger xD
she bought me ice tea O_O thanks =D i needed a drink x.x
1620: drink drink... eat some french fries...
1625: took a cab to some lan =o which sarks xD
16:30 play audi~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

17XX: prada came O_O xD
then we played l4d LOL bur jie dunnoe how to play =x

1835: logged off the account and went to busstop~

rotting u.u

---

just woke up ~_~ 1336

---

so anyway, we took a bus 30 @_@ then alight at boon lay mrt there xD
then go kfc xD hmm......

been thinking of alfred x.x =(
eat... fries x.x
then go mos burger x.x
then i call yaoming korkor >< =(
ask for alfred number x.x
hais...... maybe he changed number or was feigning ignorance ~_~ nevermind...

drank some ice tea......
then we sent bur off x.x on the way got an indian sister (her uniform like singapore chinese girls school liddat <.<) talking to her brother then got a farnie face, then prada laugh xDD
then bur also laugh then i try to hide my laughter x.x
the two people kept on looking at us lor xD
anyway, bye jie xD thanks for the day~


then prada and i slacked at the playground near bur's house x.x
i was emo-ing T_______T thinking of alfred
very pain lea =( sobsob...... kept on saying "korkor不要离开我……" with a PATHETIC, SUBMISSIVE VOICE

痛痛痛痛痛痛痛

then we walked around the place LOL


walk until Pioneer mrt O____________O

then went to nearby playground, got swing =D
swing~ swing~ she complain she very 热 so that's her outlet for the internal stuffiness

after some time, took a bus back to boon lay =o
non air-con~ windie =D

sent her off xD
byebye xD 223X

then...... took mrt to bukit batok @_@ coz malcolm say can pei me xD
then bukit batok le... got one old man ask me how to get to yio chu kang mrt =o
so i directed him xD
wait wait wait... i call malcolm x.x
then talk halfway phone no batterie
DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD:!!!!!!!
so i rushed to malcolm house below x.x walking quickly xD
he not there DDDDDD: =((

so i slack around at the playground...... hoping he would come u.u
so long le, i forget which flat he lives in x.x 290C or 290D or 290E x.x
EMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD: ALFRED T_T sobsob i was hurt T_T badly
wait for very long le, then i...... walk around the place x.x found a coin phone =o
used 10cents to find malcolm x.x
i forget his number lor, heng i tried out one number x.x
then he say he coming...................................

then i wait sommore DDDDDDDDDDDD:
havent appear T_T
so i like resting at the slide there... then he finallie appeared with his friend x.x
0010 liao lor
haha... chatted abit... talked about audi u.u
reminiscing, last time he pro-er than me lor
now i pro-er than him xD
talk talk talk... say his sec2 camp very pooi xD
then he wan go up eat something x.x

then i wait......... and fell asleep @_@
he nvr come down T_T
then 3am+... some phonie old man -.- woke me up
i "UHHHHHHHHHHHHH" x.x
then he dunnoe speak what lingo. go away la -.-

continute to rest abit... then wake up walk around the place u.u sobsob
walk walk walk walk walk...... u.u
then gonna 5am+, walk to other "islands" x.x
walk.............
wah, the wet market preparing for business later in the morning
and i suffering from sinus crap since the day started lor ~_~ since friday
then walk to near my aunt's house O_O see police car, wonder what police do -.-
stereotype us teenagers? yea.

went 7-11... scrutinised for value-for-money offers xD
bought two 600ml coke bottles for 2 dollars xD one pepsi twist, one 7-up

went to the nearby busstop... dunnoe if 852 is alreadie in operation
First bus: 0542
yup xD its 0550
wait...... wait.............. finallie came xD
took it @_@
the roads very emptie... thirtie minutes reach opposite the religious place at amk x.x
overslept by one stop lor, so tired ~_~
then walked to busstop... took a cold 74 x.x
low current, high voltage xD the aircon
then very fast reach opposite monfort x.x gonna 7 le...... walked home after dwelling at the park abit x.x

started the com up... bloodie crashes -.-
then started to type a new post.
tired. went to bed. and slept x.x
till 13++ xD
I'm in love with alfred... or, if you are smarter, i am dwelling in pleasurable thoughts.
Samuel and God bless my mother

Labels: 09start, adventure, audition, l4d, nobatterie, oversleep

Hundred-fifth Post: Dilemmas

A lot is going on in my mind.

1. 74 kia could he be an agent?
2. To see or not to see. To see or not to see... consider the consequences
3. Possibly another WeiKang... _|_ I hate you!
4. Beguiled youths...... What can I do?
5. To give generously, or retain what's prized? to donate the boat note, to give a birthday cake?
Feelings of incorrigibleness as well as hypocrisy... Sheesh
stalking. and talking rubbish
And someone's birthday is approaching...

And someone's birthday is today!
HAPPIE BIRTHDAY PIM :DDD
生日快乐！！！
Herzlichen Glückwunsch zum Geburtstag xD

Samuel

Labels: 09start, happiebirthday